The pain and the exhaustion just never ends does it? You get little glimpses of what it's like to be healthy again, and that's when it returns with a vengeance.
I'm sorry to sound so bitter, but I am. This past week has been hell. I'm always tired, always hurting. I'm broke. I literally have 8 cents in my bank account right now. I have work tomorrow, and the thought of standing on my feet for 6.5 hours is making me cry. My mom is always on my back about something. Homework, cleaning, chores around the house, my job, and always discrediting my pain and what I'm going through. I'm not lazy. I'm tired of hearing how I'm lazy. I try so hard to keep up. I just can't. And I'm frustrated enough by it already without my mom hounding me about it.
I miss living on my own. I miss cooking my own food. I miss actually enjoying my job and being able to support myself. I miss my daily walks. I miss seeing my boyfriend all the time and not falling asleep while doing homework. I miss walking up stairs without feeling like I ran a marathon.
Fuck Lupus. I just want a break.